July 2010
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Hit the repeat button on iTunes, sit as you try to shut out the voices in your head, close your eyes and feel the warmth well up within. So alone and so scared. The silver that gleams in the distant, the urge to run it over and over till you pass out and everything is calm again. Tell me it’s okay, tell me I’ll be okay. It’s getting so hard to breathe.
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My Godfinger planet is just as lonely as I am. No friends, so hard to find someone to talk to. So many things on my mind. And then I realised, all that was said that June night by the pool. Nothing but lies and empty promises.
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I wanted to sort out my head a little bit. I thought I could do it. Open it, take a peek, go through the drawers of bad and good memories, if there were any, pull out all the negativity and start over. I couldn’t, I flipped and pushed and drag heavy trunks of memories. I couldn’t find a single happy one. Memories of hazy afternoons spent bent over the toilet, fingers down the throat,...
bonyskinnything-deactivated2010 asked: i love your blog! are you a weight loss blog? or just one promoting thin beauty? xo
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manisima asked: love your blog♥
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endomorph-deactivated20110530-d asked: You are wanted, you are worthy of love, if he has forgotten you, then he doesn't deserve you. You're a beautiful person.
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puellae-deactivated20110712-dea asked: your blog is beautiful
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Thank you all so much for following my tumblr. Thank you all for putting up with my endless rants, depressed and sometimes suicidal posts.
I am not good with words and sometimes words don’t fit the pain within. Alone on the train, surrounded by people, completely voided. My mind raced to a thousand and one places. Here, there, up, down. Feeding on the sickening euphoria of my pants getting...
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“What is an ‘instant death’ anyway? How long is an instant? Is it one second?...”
– John Green (via porcelains, prettysins)
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Hush now, it’s going to be okay. Hush now, breathe in; 1, 2, 3. Hush now. It’s okay, it’s okay. Hush now, run that shimmering silver across your shrinking wrist. Hush now, shrink further. Smaller and smaller till he notices. He said he’ll stay but he left, he said he’ll be there for you but he left. He left because he has a new girlfriend, left because he has no...
