Hello followers, I hope your day is going well. Thank you all for following me. I am so glad that miles away, there is someone going through the exact same torture my mind puts me through. I’m off to work. Dear Lord, get me through this 8 hours. Make the fucking wireless work. I need to see the wonderful photos/texts on my dashboard even if it’s only for an hour. Tyvm. I promise to talk to you more if you help me on this.
I have an eating disorder. Not Bulimia or Anorexia but EDNOS (Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified). This means that I alternate between puking and starving. I also have rules. Bread has to be eaten in even numbers. Cake is evil. Carbohydrates are secretly plotting against me. Diet Coke is the…
I’ve been down so low, people look at me and they know.
They can tell something is wrong,
Like I don’t belong.
And I know that it’s a wonderful world but I can’t feel it right now.
Well, I thought I was doing well but I just want to cry now.
And I know that it is a wonderful world, from the sky down to the sea.
I can only see it when you’re here with me.
Hi I just read your post titled 'Dear mummy' Just thought I'd say although I don't know you I hope things get better for you. and I'm sorry about your dad and your situation. Things will get better one day hang in there <33
Do you love me? Do you care if I am dead or alive? Do you know I am purging blood together with food that I’ve eaten? Do you know you make me feel like I am the primary reason why my father is dead and that tears me up inside? Do you have any idea how hard I am trying to destroy myself? Do you know how hard I am struggling in school? Do you know you’re the reason why I decided to further my studies? I don’t care if you’re Chinese, I don’t care if you were never taught to say “I love you”. I need you to know that “I love you” can potentially save my life. Do you know I’ve once almost died because I stopped eating? Do you even know how hard life is for me? Everything is about you. Your heart has no room for me.
Dear Mummy, this will all be too late one day, if not soon. I love you, I love you with all that I have. I am sorry for being such a failure, I am sorry about dad’s passing. I am sorry I couldn’t be the perfect daughter, I am sorry I have so many problems, I am sorry I’m depressed, I am sorry for being me.