P A R A N O I A

Month

March 2010

Cut, starve, binge, purge, cut, starve, binge, purge. This stupid cycle is driving me crazy. My friends see my cuts, they worry and think I’m stupid for doing it. But they don’t know the real reasons behind the cuts. I’m stressed out, frustrated, helpless and lonely. This is the only way I know how to make me feel alive. This is my only identity.

I’m not exceptionally bright neither do I have a face of an angel. I don’t do exceptionally well neither am I popular with friends. I am not rich neither am I exceptionally poor. I don’t cut or starve for attention. It’s the only way I know I am real. It’s the only way I know how to release my fears and frustrations. I need protection too. I’m weak and vulnerable. I want to cry when I want to. I hate myself.

Mar 31, 2010
#personal
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Mar 31, 2010
The best feeling in the world

is to wake up and see all the likes and reblogs. Lol, makes my day. :3

Mar 31, 20102 notes
#personal
Mar 30, 2010
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In class today

my classmate said, “I think you should eat something.” I asked her why and she said I looked skinny. It made me happy. For awhile. But it also made me more determined to lose the weight I’ve gained back. I am still unhappy. I wished I could tell them how I’m feeling. I know I’m hurting them because they care for me. 

Mar 30, 2010
#personal
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